Simple Joys

READY…  "We only need to open our eyes to see the gifts that abound all around us. These are the simple joys in life." ~ Genevieve Gerard

AIM… Christmas.  It brings out the “merry” in people.  It brings out the “humbug” in people.  It reminds us of the missing pieces in our lives.  It gives us a skip in our step.  It makes us feel like a child again.  It makes us long for the warmth and connection of family.  It gives us hope. 

Christmas is so many things to each one of us.  But today, I am overwhelmed with feelings that I need to share that I know, are meant just for you, this Christmas.  I need to remind you to forget about all the wrappings, and gifts, and cookies, and perfect decorations, and making sure you invited all the right people.  I need to remind you to take a moment to breathe.  Stand still.  Close your eyes.  Take a deep breath.  Breathe in the smells of Christmas.  Breathe in the peace of the season.  Breathe in the opportunity to rest and reflect.  Now, as you open your eyes, commit to finding joy in a simple moment this Christmas weekend.  Jesus was a mere babe.  A tiny wonder.  An explosion of joy wrapped in a simple package.  Look for the simple moments of joy that will explode in your heart this year.  They will become special memories for you every Christmas.  That one, simple joyful moment will allow you to recognize and treasure the true meaning of love, hope, laughter, promise and peace.  Those joys are the real gems at the heart of Christmas spirit. 

Simple Joys.  So easy.  So necessary.  So priceless.  

Merry Christmas, my friends!

FIRE!  Promise yourself you will look for and recognize your simple moment of joy this Christmas.  When you discover it, breathe in deeply so you can capture all the nuances of the senses as the joy envelopes your heart.  See, you’re smiling!  That’s real joy!!

Be Excellent!

Lori 

Private Thoughts

READY…  “Don't let people's compliments go to your head and don't let their criticisms go to your heart.  To the depth we do either of these things, is to the depth we'll be ruled by what other people think of us. And boy, is it dangerous to build the stability of our identity on the fickle opinions of others.”  ~ Lysa TerKeurst

AIM… Admit it.  You have private thoughts about people, their lives, what they do or don’t do.  As you encounter people in the midst of their circumstances, do you offer suggestions and actually share your private thoughts about what they are going through?  Maybe you share your private thoughts on social media, since you don’t have to see those people face to face.  I’m sure you know exactly what private thoughts I’m talking about; your judgments, comments and criticisms about someone’s personal choices, actions, conversations and the like.  Let’s face it, whether solicited or not, we all have private thoughts about other people. 

More often than not, however, there are moments when people’s private thoughts spill out of their mouths and sting our hearts, leaving us feeling inferior.  There are also moments when those private thoughts can actually give our egos a huge boost, but then we end up walking around with big heads.  Lysa TerKeurst’s advice in the “READY” quote above is great wisdom for us to tuck away in that safe place of our brains as an invaluable life lesson.  It is so easy to get caught up in seeking the approval of others that we can lose sight of our own motivation, drive and intentions.  One well-intentioned but negative comment is all it takes to derail us from our goals; and getting back on track is often a painful journey.  My friends, don’t let other people’s private thoughts about you determine your destiny.  Choose your direction.  Stay the course.  If opinions and comments pass through your ears, use a sensible filter as to how you choose to weigh those words.  Keep your eyes on the prize and move those mountains knowing YOU value the private thoughts in your own head and heart.    

FIRE!  Choose to filter what you hear today.  Be careful not to internalize those negative comments and gently balance those positive atta-boys and atta-girls.  Speak life into the lives of those around you so your private thoughts don’t become public thoughts toward those you love.

Be Excellent!

Lori 

Turn Down For What

READY…  “Not merely an absence of noise, Real Silence begins when a reasonable being withdraws from the noise in order to find peace and order in his inner sanctuary.”  ~ Peter Minard

AIM… Turn Down For What is the title of a popular song by Lil Jon and DJ Snake that ended up being the 7^th best selling track of 2014.  With its catchy dance beat and synthesized groove, you can’t help but turn UP the song in your car when it’s on the radio.  However, this song title also makes me think about all the “noise” we allow in our lives that inevitably drowns out the things that matter most.  All that extra noise causes stress, discontent and anxiety. 

So, why should we turn down the outside influences and eliminate all the distractions that capture our attention?  Let’s face it, we can all admit there are things in our world that cause us to focus less on our priorities and more on nonsense.  Agreed?  Need a few examples?  100 extra unsolicited email advertisements, vacation promotions and coupon offers in your inbox; every day.  Video games and gaming apps.  200+ cable or satellite TV stations (and still nothing worthwhile to watch.)  Facebook.  Instagram.  Twitter.  Google +.  Tumblr.  Snapchat.  Get the idea? 

When was the last time you left your phone at home (without feeling naked) and stepped outside to listen to the wind whisper through the leaves in the trees or the birds welcoming spring with their sweet songs?  Just that thought, brings a sense of serenity and peace to my soul.  So why in the world can’t we turn down the noise?  It’s a choice.  It’s the new phenomenon called FOMO - fear of missing out. What in the world are we afraid we are going to miss; Sweet Susie’s meatloaf dinner picture or an episode of Modern Family?  We must choose to disconnect and turn down or turn off the things that cause us stress and strife, and choose to plug into the means that enable us to feel joy and peace. 

Shhhh, listen!  It’s the sound of silence.  Ahhh…..

FIRE!  This week, choose one area where you can turn down the noise in your life.  Make a commitment to delete something unnecessary.  You will feel relieved and free, guaranteed! 

Be Excellent!

Lori 

Are You A Leader?

READY…  “Become the kind of leader that people would follow voluntarily; even if you had no title or position.”  ~ Brian Tracy

AIM… Are you a leader?  It’s an interesting question.  Some folks might answer immediately with yes or no.  Other folks may need to ponder that answer due to the situations they’ve encountered in life.  

I attended two days of intensive training with my executive team at work this week, and one of the exercises involved sharing the characteristics of the person who has had the most influence on you (not including your family members.)  Here are the results:  

“mentor, caring, approachable, motivational, responsible, encouraging, consistent, passionate, structured, sacrifice, teacher, integrity, good listener, instrumental, helpful, not afraid to get dirty, provides accountability, honest, character, dedicated, empathetic, courageous.”

The end result was the observation that all those influential people were leaders to each one of us in one way or another, whether they were teachers, coaches, friends, bosses, co-workers, advisors, etc.  I think you’d probably agree with that list and might even have a few more to add yourself. 

The characteristics that the people in our lives need most from us at home, at work, on the field, at church and at your social events are in that list above.  Take a moment to reread that list of characteristics and ask yourself, “Are you a leader?”  Why are (or aren’t) you giving people what they deserve; the very best version of you, their leader?  A good thought to evaluate as you continue to target excellence in all areas of your life.

FIRE!  As you reviewed the list of good leader characteristics, choose one in which you feel you need improvement.  Take the time to foster growth in that area by finding resources online, in a new book or ask YOUR most influential person to give your pointers and tips on being an excellent leader.

Be Excellent!

Lori

Bring Your Own Sunshine

READY…  “Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.”  ~ Anthony D’Angelo 

AIM… I’ve heard so many people grumbling about us having a long winter this year.  You know, I think, here in Ohio, it’s just been that we’ve had more larger snowfalls than normal, causing everyone to stay home, which leads to several severe cases of cabin fever.  The official first day of spring is always March 21^st, so winter is no longer than normal; we’ve just had to stay indoors WAY longer than usual!  Winter is also tough because we have limited exposure to the sunlight, and feeling the warmth of the sun on your face is enough to brighten anyone’s outlook.  (I know my warmer climate readers will agree wholeheartedly!)

Interestingly, we may encounter seasons in our lives, when we feel like we are in a perpetual winter.  Some days you may feel like you just want to pull the covers over your head, snuggle down in bed and stay warm and insulated from our cold-hearted world.  However, as cozy and secure as that sounds, it doesn’t get us any closer to stepping into a fresh new season of life.  Sometimes you just have to make up your mind that you are going to create your own sunshine.  It’s not always easy, but you can CHOOSE to get out of bed and do something that makes you happy.  It’s not always fun, but you can CHOOSE to watch a comedy or read a few jokes to make you laugh.  It’s not always convenient, but you can CHOOSE to make plans with a friend to get out of the house, do something different and get some much-needed positive encouragement.

While we cannot control the weather, we can control our choices each day of our lives.   Today, I encourage you to choose to do something that makes you feel the warmth of the sun in your heart.  You’ll feel one thousand times better AND your light will brighten the day of another, guaranteed.

 

FIRE!  Trying to beat the winter blues?  Do something different.  Have an indoor picnic and eat your dinner on the floor on a blanket.  Have an indoor snowball fight with rolled up socks.  Got more ideas?  Share your sunshine with others and watch them smile!

Be Excellent!

Lori Bodkin

Following Your Dream

READY…  “If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.”  ~ Henry David Thoreau

AIM…  Hello, loyal AOI readers!  “Where in the world have you been?”  I heard that a lot during the absence of my weekly messages. Honestly, my radical sabbatical came from a divine order to follow a dream.  One day I’m writing inspiration for you, the next day I get connected with another writer and SHAZAM!  We’re off and writing a book together!  So, all this time I’ve been working on a book with another author and several contributing authors and trudging through the details of getting our book published, etc.  The happy announcement is that our book is published and is available in paperback or online as an e-book!  WOO HOO!  Talk about a labor of love!

Personally, I have been told many times that I would one day write a book…or at least, I should write a book. That dream laid dormant in my heart for many years.  There would be times when I’d walk by the book store and wonder what it would be like to see a book on the shelf with MY name on it. When the opportunity presented itself for me to pursue my dream, it exploded like a firework on the 4^th of July!  So many elements fell right into place.  My co-author and I had never met before and after one connection by a mutual friend, our creative sparks ignited.  Our words and stories flowed into multiple pages of inspiration.  The publisher was able to jump several hurdles she had never encountered before through the process of getting our book in print.  It was all divinely appointed and directed and the evidence is my dream, our dream, come true as the final product to share with you.

So, what are you dreaming about today?  Are there desires deep down in your heart that you would love to see come to pass?  Perhaps, it’s not quite time for them to be fulfilled…yet.  However, what you cannot see are all the preparations that are going on behind the scenes of your life plan.  Maybe you recognize an opportunity to take a leap of faith and jump one step closer to making your dream come true.  Wherever you are on that path and whatever you are thinking about today, may you look to the future with great anticipation.  Exciting things are happening and I simply cannot wait to hear all about them and cheer you on!

FIRE!  Take just a few moments to jot down a couple things you’d like to accomplish in your lifetime.  (Some people call it their personal bucket list; others call it their dreaming list.)  Whatever you call it, commit your desires to paper and put it where you’ll be reminded of your goals on a regular basis.  As your dreams come true, write “VICTORY” on your list and then look forward to your next moment of fabulous success.

Be Excellent!

Lori

 

 

 

Listening

READY... “It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen.”  ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes

AIM…  “Why can’t you just listen to me?”  Ugh!  It’s extremely frustrating to me when my children do not listen when told to do something.  Most days I just feel like the only thing coming out of my mouth is the droning sound of the teacher in Charlie Brown comics, “Whaa – Whaah,  Whaa – Whaah – Whaah.”  (I know you just sounded that out so you could recall the voice yourself.  LOL!)  But seriously, I just want my words to be heard and acknowledged.

It is just as frustrating, if not moreso, when adults don’t listen.  Humans have an innate need to be heard; whether it is to voice an opinion or to provide instruction. However, the receiver of that information must decide to hear what you are saying. Your need to be heard will never override a person’s decision to hear what you are saying. After all, we can choose to listen to music with explicit lyrics, or we can choose not to listen to our co-workers gossip.  We can choose to listen to the sounds of birds singing in the morning, or we can choose not to listen to the cricket chirping in the corner of the basement.  Listening can be good and listening can be, well, not so great.  What we do with what we hear makes all the difference too.

So, are you a good listener?  When having conversation with another person, do you look him in the eye?  Are you engaged in the details of her story or do you check out and look around the room?  If you desire to be heard when you speak, I urge you to become a good listener to others.  Perhaps you will find they will return the favor. (Now, how can I convince my kids to LISTEN to my advice??)

FIRE!  Today, instead of checking your email, texts or Facebook updates on your smart phone, give your friends, family members and colleagues your full and undivided attention.  You’ll be surprised at the positive connections made through this simple act of respect and good listening skills.

Be Excellent!

Lori

The Pain of Change

READY…  "There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self.” ~Aldous Huxley

AIM…  Until the pain of change is greater than the pain of staying the same, people will choose to do what they know.  Sigh.  I know.  I have realized that I am no longer a spring chicken.  I’m starting to feel my season in life: emotionally, physically and financially.  I guess that means I need to make some changes in order to feel differently. 

Change is hard, though.  I don’t know about you, but I like it when I feel comfortable with my life, my routine, and my environment.  I don’t like it when my schedule gets shaken and stirred.  However, I do know, that when my life starts turning upside down, it’s time to embrace the new change that’s about to happen.  Yes, this mid-life mama has got to take time to care for herself and tackle some of these necessary changes head on.  What are you facing in your life that is pushing you to embrace a new change?

 

As we step out of our comfort zones to grab ahold of our new changes, remember it’s often helpful to enlist a friend who wants to change too.  Sure, it’s easy to tell yourself you are going to make the necessary changes to move ahead, but the accountability of another partner might be just the key to push you into making the next step forward and maintaining your commitment. So how ‘bout it?  Let’s stop procrastinating and start today making a baby step in the right direction for the positive changes we need in our lives.

FIRE!  Ask a trusted friend to help you start, and maintain, momentum toward achieving a new goal in your life.  Give her permission to ask you regularly about your progress.  Whether it’s making a career change, adjusting your budget, starting an exercise program or simply taking time each day just for yourself, you are worth every step that places you that much closer to victory.

 

Be Excellent!

Lori

When It Rains

READY... “I will send you rain in its season and the ground will yield its crops and the trees of the field their fruit.”  Leviticus 26:4  

AIM...  When it rains it pours… and pours and pours.  The first part of this summer was hard.  It rained EVERY DAY for at least 14 days straight, and I’m certain a few more.  YUCK!  I was beginning to think I missed the memo to start building my ark.  During that time, I began detoxing from all my commitments, everyone’s expectations and unplugging from my once over-committed, candle-burning-at-both-ends life.  As gloomy as the weather was outside, my driven spirit started feeling like I was stepping into a gloomy funk.  (Hence my divine absence, Friends.)

However, as the sun began to shine and brighten our summer, the fog started lifting on my gloomy funk and new life breathed into my world.  Ahhh, the refreshing and relieving sight of a clear calendar and no formal obligations.  While that moment only lasted for about 30 seconds, I reveled in the peace that flooded my once overwhelmed heart and mind.  I realized that the “Son” was shining and Jesus was trying to lift away the fog in my life and His light wanted to grow new fruit in me.  Galatians5:22-23 says, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.”   In order for trees to bear the best fruit, they need plenty of sunshine and water (rain).  Apparently, in my life, in order for me to actively demonstrate and enjoy the fruits of the spirit, I too need plenty of “Son”shine by letting God “reign.”

When it rains it pours.  BUT, when God reigns in your life, He pours blessings into your world.  He pours forth His love, His mercy, His forgiveness, His tenderness, His peace, and His everything wonderful.  Next time it rains, I will look to the sky and be grateful for the bountiful harvest that is to come.

FIRE!  Take a quick break to step outside and enjoy a moment of sunshine today.  Ahh, the warmth of the sun feels so good you can’t help but sense God’s love shining down on you…not to mention the boost of Vitamin D – divine vitamins!  

Be Excellent!

Lori

 

The "F" Word

READY... “Insane people are always sure that they are fine.  It is only the sane people who are willing to admit that they are crazy.”  ~ Nora Ephron

AIM... It’s the most common response out of everyone’s mouth, “I’m FINE.”  Yep, it’s that infamous “F” word which covers so many bases.  When someone asks how we are doing, why do we resort to telling folks we are fine when, in fact, we are most often not fine.  Why don’t we say we are fantastic, fabulous or fair?   Why don’t we say we are freaked out, in a funk or feeling frustrated?  More often than not, we don’t want to take the time to share how we really feel because we don’t want to get into a discussion about what is really going on in our lives.  However, there are times we don’t want to share our real feelings because the person asking isn’t someone we would necessarily share our intimate details with; he is simply being polite in his asking.

So, are you resigned to live a life that’s simply fine?  I encourage you to step outside of the “fine” life and live boldly and own your feelings.  If someone you trust asks how you are doing, surprise her with a REAL answer.  You might be amazed at her response because you didn’t just pass her off with the typical “fine” answer.  Be great.  Be sad.  Be angry.  Be under the weather.  Be peachy.  Be overwhelmed.  And always…be excellent!

FIRE!  For one day, I challenge you to be anything but FINE.  Use this challenge as a fun experiment to see what kind of reactions you receive from folks.  If nothing else, it will be an entertaining day!  

Be Excellent!

Lori

A Letter To My Teenage Son

READY... “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6 NKJV


AIM... A Letter To My Teenage Son:

Wow!  You are growing up fast!  Wasn’t it just yesterday you were watching Blue’s Clues and playing with Thomas the Train?  So many things seem to have changed in your life, and my life, in such a short time since you turned 13.

You know, being a teenager is hard, but being the mom of a teenager is hard too.  As you continue to grow and mature into a young man, here are a few things I want to make sure you know:

1.    I love you; plain and simple.  When you are happy, I love you.  When you are sad, I love you.  When you are mad at me, I love you.  When you make mistakes, I still love you.  I will celebrate all your victories, big and small, and love you always.

2.   Be yourself.  Learn to love who God created you to be.  You are unique and different.  There’s no one else in the world like you.  When everyone wants to look the same and do the same things, do what YOU want to do and wear what YOU want to wear.  Kids may tease or make fun of you – it’s just because they are jealous of your self-confidence and it’s the only way they know how to cover up their insecurities.  Do your best to ignore them.  They aren’t worth your time and energy.

 

3.   Do your best. Always.  No matter what you do in life, make sure you always give it your best effort.  Whether you are taking a test in school, playing music for a concert, trying out for a sport, mowing the grass, cleaning your room, or babysitting your little sister – you want to be sure you’ve given everything your best shot and can feel good about the outcome or end result, whatever it may be.  No one likes receiving a bad grade or having to re-do a chore or job.  However, if it was performed with your best effort, then you’ll have no regrets.  If the results aren’t as you expected, evaluate your effort and try harder next time. 

 

4.   Be a good friend.  Everyone needs at least one good friend they can count on.  Be sure to listen when your friend needs to talk.  Stick up for him when the world attacks.  Lift him up when the chips are down.  Have a high five and fist bump ready when he’s successful.  Be supportive an encouraging when he’s scared.  Be trustworthy and learn to keep his secrets.  Be loyal and stand by him through the good and the bad times.  Have fun together.  Laugh until your stomach hurts.  Be buds for life.

 

5.   Respect girls/women.  You are just starting to recognize the external beauty of young women.  As you mature, you’ll realize that external beauty is a bonus – the real beauty of a woman comes from her heart and her character.  Treat girls with kindness.  Be polite.  Open doors for them. Offer your seat so a woman can sit down.  Be a hero and a knight in shining armor.  Be a good listener.  Buy flowers, just because.  Laugh together.  Treat her like a princess.  Smile.  Be kind to her mother and father.  Tell her she’s beautiful.  Be faithful.  Be a gentleman at all times.

 

6.   Be a young man of excellent character.  Make wise choices.  Be honest and trustworthy.  Never compromise your personal standards.  Establish boundaries.  Have integrity.  Stand by your good morals and values.  Always remember it’s important to do the right thing when everyone is watching you, but it’s more important to do the right things when no one is watching you.

 

7.   The love of money is the root of all evil.  What I mean is, it’s ok to work hard and make a good living and to save some money for a rainy day.  However, money doesn’t buy happiness; it simply gives you opportunities for more choices.  Your attitude about money can make or break you.  Don’t be greedy.  Be responsible with your money.  Save some, spend some, give some away.  God gave you the ability to earn your money, respect Him and give 10% back to God.  He will always provide for your needs as long as you are responsible.  If you can bless others, be a blessing.  Make wise choices about how you spend your money.  Just because somebody has brand new things, doesn’t mean you need to have the same brand new things too.  They may be in debt up to their eyeballs.  Be smart.  Buy what you need, when you need it and a little frivolity now and then is ok.  Having lots of money and things doesn’t make you a good person or a better person.  Period.

 

8.   Just say no to drugs and alcohol.  Seriously.  All it takes is one time and you could be dead.  Get high on having fun in life.  Don’t think a medicine is going to make you feel good about yourself or what’s going on in your world.  Learn to have fun without those outside influences.  You’ll be safe.  You’ll be responsible.  You’ll be thankful because you will see what drugs and alcohol will do to the kids around you and it’s scary, sad and will negatively affect you for the rest of your life.  Make smart choices.

 

9.   Sex is beautiful….when you are with your wife.  God created man and woman to have children and grow the world.  He wanted sex to be a symbol of love between a husband and wife who are committed to each other for life.  Unfortunately, our world has taken this beautiful connection and ruined it with all sorts of perverse media outlets and empty promises of satisfaction outside of the safety of marriage.  I can only hope and pray you will shield your eyes and ears from the negative sensations that will tempt you in school, work and life.  My prayer is for you to commit to a pure heart, mind and body that you can gift to your wife on your wedding day.  I promise, it will be truly beautiful for you both.

 

10.  Above all else, God loves you.  All these things I’ve told you are ways you can grow up to be a mature, young man.  However, life is full of difficult situations and temptations.  Should you trip up, make a poor choice or fall short of your ideals – God will still love you.  He created you, designed you for a purpose and already knows what you are or aren’t going to do.  And yet – He still loves you.  Nothing is greater than God’s love and His promise of heaven and eternal life.  So remember, you are human, you will make mistakes in life; but God will be waiting with open arms to hug you, welcome you back, give you peace and love you no matter what…forever.

 

I hope you take these words to heart.  Please know I only care about your well-being and want the very best for you while you are in my care here on earth.  I believe in you, always, and look forward to the future and watching you grow into an even more amazing young man.

 

Love you always,
Mom  xoxo

FIRE!   Teen years are trying years.  Do you know a teenager?  Make a date to spend time with him or her over ice cream this summer and talk.  Ask questions.  Listen to his responses.  Affirm her dreams and aspirations.  Be intentional about connecting.  You will be an incredible blessing.  

 

Be Excellent!

Lori

I Gotta Rep To Protect

READY...  “It takes many good deeds to build a good reputation, and only one bad one to lose it.”  ~ Benjamin Franklin

AIM…  “Hey, I gotta rep to protect!”  These days, most kids don’t seem to care about their reputation.  In fact, many of them think it’s funny or cool to have a questionable reputation because that gives them notoriety.  Really?!?  Who told them those actions or behavior choices were cool?  Why aren’t their parents correcting their uncool behavior?  Perhaps their parents are too cool to correct?  You know the ones; “those parents.”  The parents who think it’s fantastic that they are their kid’s friends.  The parents who don’t read their kid’s text messages or review their Facebook page or Instagram profile.  The ones who think curfews are old fashioned and watching inappropriately-themed movies with their kid is hilarious.  Really?!?  Who told them those actions or behavior choices were cool?  What would THEIR parents have to say?

Truthfully, the pressure to be a cool parent is daunting.  However, the pressure to raise your children to become responsible, God-fearing, intelligent, polite, outstanding citizens is even more daunting.  It takes time to sit down and talk to your children about their lives, who they are hanging out with, and what they like or dislike.  It takes time to review their technology usage, monitor their electronic conversations, and ask questions about their online friends and connections.  It takes time to investigate movies, music and the latest apps and establish age-appropriate boundaries AND enforce those boundaries.  Other parents might say that you are weird, uncool or not normal to be infiltrating your kid’s world.  I say, I’d rather be uncool and weird every day of the year and know I have a kid who is going to make a positive difference in this world.  Hey, I got a rep to protect too!

FIRE!  Talk to your child (or a child in your family) about what they get excited about or what they really like to do (other than play with electronic devices.)  Get interested in a few things they enjoy and see your connections grow and your positive influence will rub off.

Be Excellent!

Lori