July 26, 2011

You've Got To Be Joking

READY...  “Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.” ~Jack Handey, "Deep Thoughts," Saturday Night Live

AIM… Some days you just need to laugh and release some stress! A friend of mine sent this email recently and even though my husband is quite sarcastic, I still found these messages to be quite humorous. Take a quick breather and enjoy a good laugh!

I had to look up "paraprosdokian". Here is the definition: "Figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation."

"Where there's a will, I want to be in it," is a paraprosdokian. Ok, so now enjoy!

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong. (Ha – loved that one!!)

War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.

Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'

You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

Hospitality is making your guests feel at home even when you wish they were.

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target. (or Arrows of Integrity!!)

FIRE! Do you have a funny joke or story to share? Send it to me (and a few of your friends.) God gave us that funny bone for a reason. He knew that there would be times in our lives that would hurt, but at that very same time He gave us the ability to laugh. You never know who needs a good laugh at just this moment!

Be Excellent!

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